Tuesday, November 20, 2012

What I was afraid of... was coming up

Really--I felt so awful yesterday. cause whaaaat? and guess whaaat? Em... what I was afraid of... was coming up yesterday. He (the wrong person) was asking her (the newbie) to be his girl. What can I say? He has not changed (the bad habit) from the past and still bring it up to now. When she said about it to me, I can only do mangap. Well--from the first I have already guessed that this kind of thing will come up, but not so soon like this. Just for two weeks then?.... And the other side I know that he was on pdkt with other girl. Hah... what can I do? Stay away from him? yeah, it must be but not at once. I will do it step by step. Hm:( do you know this kind of feeling? A jealous but you're nothing to him and he is too. An angry but you don't have any right to do it. A dissapointment that you should not to feel. I feel it now. I do feel it:( by the way, he did it again on last Sunday to me and on Monday he asked the girl to be his girl? What kind of BASTARD are you huh? I promise to my self that I will keep on disctance and only meet him if I need him or other something urgent whereas I know if it's hard to do:(((( but I have to! :"). And for you, the other him in my life... I'm sorry I really have to broke our relationship  up:( this is the best way and I'm not the right person for you. I'm too bad for you, you should find a girl that faaaar away better from me ya :") forgive me if I feel 'gejolak' with another guy, I'm sorry.

Monday, November 12, 2012

Aku Tahu dan Aku Mengalaminya

Entah bagaimana mulanya...
Namun kini aku menyukai orang yang salah.
Kamu tahu rasanya ingin melupakan tapi dia bukan milik kamu?
Kamu tahu rasanya ingin move on dari orang yang bahkan bukan bekas kamu?
Dan apakah kamu tahu rasanya ciuman pertama di bibir sucimu tapi bukan oleh pacar kamu?
Aku tahu,
Aku tahu,
dan aku tahu.
Karena aku sedang mengalaminya sekarang.

Orang bilang, suka karena terbiasa. Indeed.
Aku mengalaminya.
Orang bilang, 'jangan bilang gak mungkin! Nanti kejadian lho!' Indeed.
Aku pun mengalaminya.

Tapi mau bagaimana? Perasaan itu datang dengan sendirinya.
Dia tak dijemput, justru bagai tamu tak diundang.

Kamu! Orang yang salah itu!
Benar-benar tidak tahu diri!
Datang dan pergi seenak jidat!
ada orang baru, lupa sama aku!

Untuk kamu yang lain,
Maaf. Aku udah ngga ngerasa ada gejolak lagi waktu sama kamu.
Semuanya udah luput dan pupus.
Bilang aku harus bagaimana?!
Apa kamu mau biarin aku ngerasain gejolak sama orang lain?
Tolong! Buat aku berpaling dari dia dan kembali lagi ke kamu!